2-Year Old Humor

Holden is now “2 and three quarters”. He knows what he wants. He knows what he doesn’t want. And he will let you know which way he’s goin’.  Lately he has been wanting to wear his jammies out and about. Once in awhile I will pick my battles and let him wear them to drop off Elliott at school, but I do not generally let him wear pajamas out in public.

This morning I needed to run some errands, so I laid out his cool motorcycle shirt and jeans. He fussed and said “No! Jammies!” So, I went and flat-ironed my hair, brushed my teeth and then went back in to fight with him…I mean get him dressed. Hmmm, I laid them out on Elliott’s bed and they were gone. Maybe he just but them back in the drawer…no. “Holdy, where is your outfit?” Ignores me and laughs. He runs away and hides in our closet behind Jay’s dress shirts. I ask Elliott to help me look for them…she said they’re under her bed. Not so. I look under Holden’s bed. Not there. By this time we’re working against the clock and I am getting more and more irritated as the minutes pass. I AM NOT GOING TO LET A 2-YEAR OLD OUTSMART ME! I am determined to find this outfit and get Elliott to school on time…..so I go downstairs and put on “Merry Madagascar” to keep them entertained and head back upstairs to solve the mystery of the missing clothing!

I go back and look in the same drawer, under the same beds, in the dress-up bin, in the pajama drawer, in the guest room, under the guest bed, in the washing machine as the top was open and I thought he may have thrown them in there. Nope! Checked the dryer. Negative. I looked in the Dora hamper. Nope. By this time I am fuming, but NOT giving up. I go in our closet and look in the pile of dirty clothes thinking he may have put them there before hiding behind Jay’s shirts. Nope! Heck, I even looked in the toilet and in the shower of their bathroom. Uh, NO!

“You’re smarter than a 2-year old. You’re smarter than a 2-year old.”

Are you effin’ kidding me? Are you serious?

You know when you’re looking for something and you just go look again in the same place you’ve already looked twice before? So, I got back on the floor and looked under their beds yet again.

I am on the verge of tears and want to scream, but I keep chanting to myself, “You’re smarter than a 2-year old.”

I go back in the laundry room and check the washing machine again – nope. Maybe I’ll check the dryer again too…sure enough…after I moved the clothes around, there they were! The cool motorcycle shirt and jeans! HE HAD BURIED THEM IN THE BACK OF THE DRYER!” I guess he could’ve put them in worse places!

So, after that ordeal, this kid was NOT going to leave the house in anything other than these two articles of clothing!

Once we were all locked and loaded in the car, on our way to school and I had ingested some coffee, I could laugh at Holden’s “humor”.

Just a simple reminder that no matter how MAD you are at the time, you usually can end up laughing about it later.